That’s the note my chiropractor added to my file at today’s appointment. In addition, he was very supportive and encouraging, telling me I had to identify those things that are out of my control and LET. THEM. GO. Yeah, tell me something I don’t know Doc.
Not to be bitchy (Dr. G is awesome and I’d never really snark at him) but that knowledge has been engraved on my brain for a long time. It’s acting on the knowledge that’s hard to get a handle on, even when my health has deteriorated as a result of the new deal at work. I used to walk at least twice a week during my lunch hour. Now I’m lucky if I get ten minutes to go get my lunch. Granted, I’m supposed to take at least half an hour but sometimes you just can’t stop what you’re doing damn it. Plus I’m not eating the healthiest, and while I am not abusing alcohol, it sure looks mighty attractive these days, which in itself is worrying. Instead of the rhetorical question – “is it Friday yet?” I’ve started asking “is it happy hour yet?”
During the checkup I explained that ironically there are “All Staff” meetings next week. Because we’re a GLOBAL monstrosity of a firm we have offices all over the world in all different time zones so they scheduled two meetings over two days to be sure everyone could participate. I’m in a west coast office so that puts our meeting time at 4 PM, when I’m tying up loose ends and getting ready to leave for the day (on a good day that is; lately I haven’t gotten out of the office till after 5). I don’t plan to stick around for more of the same old same old from the Poobahs.
Amusingly, the BigWig who sent the email announcing the meetings pointed out that they want everyone’s questions and they even set up a confidential link to submit those questions anonymously. Phft! I told Dr. G I was tempted to test the anonymity of that link by sending the following:
“This question is directed to the genius who came up with the Shared Services idea: What the fuck?!”
Then I gasped and covered my mouth in shock. I can be foul-mouthed at times, but I’ve never used that kind of language around any of my health care providers and I was completely stunned it had popped out this morning. But Dr. G just laughed and I found myself laughing too. He did recommend that if I submit the question I change it to “WTF?!” to be on the safe side.
So work sucks and doesn’t show signs of improving any time soon. When another secretary on the team texted me last night that she was thinking of “looking” – as in for another job(!) – I felt my heart drop even further. Oh sure, it isn’t as if I haven’t thought about it. But I’m going to be 59 this year. Who’s going to hire someone who might retire within the decade? Even with 30 years experience I’m not that marketable.
Life however, goes on.